Germany, Austria and Italy space standing with each other in the middle of a pub once Serbia bumps right into Austria and also spills Austria's pint.

You are watching: World war 2 as a bar fight

EUROPEAN history can be rather gloomy. But this type of point livens it increase (apologies if it's bien connu—it's new to me).

Germany, Austria and also Italy are standing together in the center of a pub as soon as Serbia bumps right into Austria and also spills Austria's pint. Austria requirements Serbia buy the a complete new suit since there space splashes top top its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's allude of view. Brother recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can't afford a entirety suit, yet offers to pay because that the clean of Austria's trousers. Russia and also Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia that it's spring at. Russia says that Austria have to leave its little brother alone. Austria inquires regarding whose army will aid Russia in compelling the to execute so. Germany appeals come Britain the France has been looking at it, and also that this is sufficiently the end of order the Britain need to not intervene. Britain replies the France can look at who it desires to, the Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going come do around it?

Germany speak Russia to prevent looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action. Britain and also France questioning Germany whether it's looking in ~ Belgium. Turkey and Germany walk off right into a corner and whisper.

When they come back, Turkey renders a display of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and also punches Belgium. France and also Britain beat Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France v one hand and also Russia v the other. Russia litter a punch at Germany, yet misses and almost falls over. Japan calls end from the various other side that the room the it's on Britain's side, but stays there. Italy surprises anyone by punching Austria.

Austria Australia punches Turkey, and also gets punched back. There are no hard feelings because Britain made Austria Australia do it. France it s okay thrown v a bowl glass window, but gets back up and carries top top fighting. Russia gets thrown through an additional one, gets knocked out, suffers mind damage, and wakes up v a finish personality change. Italy throw a punch at Austria and also misses, yet Austria falls over anyway.

Italy raises both fists in the air and runs ring the room chanting. America waits it spins Germany is around to autumn over from continual punching native Britain and France, climate walks over and also smashes it through a barstool, climate pretends it won the fight all by itself. By currently all the chairs room broken and the huge mirror end the bar is shattered. Britain, France and also America agree the Germany threw the very first punch, for this reason the entirety thing is Germany's fault. If Germany is tho unconscious, they go with its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

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Has anyone viewed a comparable version because that WWII ? and does anyone recognize who the author is?

Many many thanks to the leader (Petr Lang) who has actually sent this splendid follow-up

In 1944, during WWII, a reception took ar in Rio de Janeiro and the Hungarian ambassador was among the invitees. The Ambassador, put on the ceremonial uniform, entered the room and also performed a Nazi salute. The hold of the reception, an influential banker, took notice of the ambassador and approached him.

“Your Excellency, you greeted v Heil Hitler. I suppose that human being of your country belong to the Nordic race?” The Ambassador replied, “No, we are of the Mongolian origin.”The Banker to be curious and continued. “I see, therefore your country must be positioned in Asia?” “No, Hungary is part of main Europe.” “I recognize that there is a battle going top top in central Europe. Is Hungary connected in that?” “Yes, indeed. We room fighting versus the Soviet Union” “And do you have any kind of territorial claims against the Soviet Union?” “No, we don't have any type of territorial claims against the Soviets. However, we do have actually them against Romania and Slovakia.”“So, Romania and also Slovakia need to be your opponents then?”“No, they room our allies.” The banker gained slightly perplexed by Ambassador's answers, yet he at some point spotted a imperial badge top top his uniform and went on asking, “I reckon that Hungary is a kingdom. How is your King doing?” “We carry out not have actually a King. We space ruled by an Admiral.” “An Admiral? Hungary must have actually an access to the sea then.”“No. We room a landlocked state.” The banker got perplexed even more. “Anyway, how is her Admiral?” “He has been recorded by the Germans.” “They are likewise your enemies?”“No, the Germans room our biggest allies and also friends.” The banker was completely lost. “Damn! ns really don't get it. You room living in the landlocked kingdom in the heart of Europe, i m sorry is rule by an Admiral, who was captured by his best friends. You room fighting a country, which you don't desire a solitary acre of floor from. ~ above the other hand, you have actually territorial claims versus your allies. What a bizarre instance is that!” “Sir, that's a new European order.”|